Things I learned today:

1. Some people in New York aren't very nice and yell.

2. Im going to spend most of my summer hot, sweaty, sticky and feeling dirty.

3. Coco helado is heaven on 95th and Lexington. It helps that there's also one on 96 and Lex.

4. New Yorkers are always plugged into their ipods, not merely because they're grumpy isolationists, but in order to escape the giggling shrieks and squeals or middle school girls on the subway.

5. Men should immediately cease wearing high-waisted pants, they do not put the ass in asset.

6. If you don't have an iphone or a blackberry, consider yourself inept, and scroll through the measly apps your lesser phone has to offer, alone. Someone actually told me to BBM them today.

Today was a long day, and I apologize if my bitterness has seeped into today's entry.

First day of work. I spent the morning researching Jack Higgins, an unpleasantly difficult task, considering the man writes under five separate names. His reasoning - to write more books, sell more books, and make more money per year. I immediately disliked him.

Quality over quantity? Someone ought to remind him of the 30 failed novels he wrote before his first best-selling hit.

Next, a final cut pro workshop with the media department. I was awed by the flashing fingers of the instructor as he clicked, double clicked, and shortcut keyed, spitting out file type names that sounded foreign. He kept asking me if I had any questions, I could hardly even respond.

I'm slightly embarrassed to announce that the highlight of my day was organizing the storage room. The job came with a label-maker. I was vested the task of organizing all the excess office supplies, neatly stacking them on the newly built shelves, and clearly labeling each as I went. It was beyond satisfying, and the label-maker was significantly more empowering than my boss knew it would be.

Speaking of bosses, the execs of the company are angelic, literally. I swear they are bigger, taller and more beautiful than ordinary people. White light follows them as they walk. Their perfectly ironed, bright colored shirts and shiny, snappy shoes make us interns, and even the secretaries, look like gremlins. Their voices are boisterous and boom across the office, announcing their preeminence. This sounds like a gross exaggeration, but is not, they are god-like.